My students immediately saw the relevance of 1984’s endless wars with Eastasia/Eurasia and the omnipresent surveillance of Big Brother. Who knew they’re smarter than Washington? Free Manning. Lower the sabre over Syria. Ignorance is strength. It’s time we show the world our weak side.
Monthly Archives: August 2013
99% of the people you meet at Christian Colleges (stereotypes)
College is starting back. Some of you will be going for the first time. You will meet new people. Some of you are going to a Christian college, one in the south, like I did. How well do you know your Christian College stereotypes? Based on the famous “99% of the People You Meet in College” article (from which I shamelessly plaigiarized), I give you a list of possible stereotypes you may encounter at a particularly Christian university in the south:
[This list is meant to make fun of stereotypes, so if you’re offended because you think one of these describes you, this blog may not be suitable for your consumption.]
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This is What It’s Like to Be a Teacher: Day 1
Today is my first day as a public school teacher.
I’ve taught before in universities, and subbed long-term in public schools. But this is my first time as a full-time teacher in a public school. I am teaching high schoolers the art of language.
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Down in the Hemlocks—A Summer Poem
[This week we’ll be saying goodbye to summer with three summer-themed poems I wrote during the summer. This untitled poem I wrote last summer, shortly after the birth of my son.]
Down in the hemlocks
I brought my young baby
My boy in a blanket
And swaddled him there
Under the hemlocks
Down by the river
The cold stony river
Under the shade
.
[For Noah]
My Short Story Makes Honorable Mention in Glimmer Train’s Fiction Open
I’m happy to announce that a short story I wrote, called “Last Day in April”, earned honorable mention in Glimmer Train‘s June Fiction Open writing contest.
I would love to share the story with my readers, but I am going to try and hold on to it for publication. If it happens, readers, you will be the first to know. Other than my family. All I can tell you is that if you like the work of Stephen Chbosky you might like this one.
I realize I haven’t shared any short pieces on this blog. Perhaps I ought to tease a few freebies in the near future.
Thank you to the editors at Glimmer Train for reading my story and placing me in Honorable Mention. They are a journal I really look up to, and it’s an honor to be considered.
Picking Blueberries at 3 Birds—A Summer Poem
[This week we’ll be saying goodbye to summer with three summer-themed poems I wrote during the summer.]
Picking Blueberries at 3 Birds
by Caleb Coy
I bring my son for the first time
To pick berries from the vine
Thirteen months old, he grabs them
By the handful
Out of the bucket
And off of the ground.
Clustered like grapes
They twist and pull
and fall into our buckets lightly.
Hand in hand we walk
Through the rows of the glade.
Among the gatherers
Among the Dutch visitors who came at dawn
In a cool June morning
When broke out the sun.
A belly full of berries
He rides on my shoulders
And gibber-gabbers
About sweet warm berries
In a perfect morning
Of a perfect day
The perfect day is pesticide free.
[For Noah]
Here is a link to 3 Bird’s Berry farm.
“I’m Prepared To Give My Life For This Or Any Country”—A Satire on Nationalism
“I’m Prepared To Give My Life For This Or Any Country”—A Satire on Nationalism
“As a true patriot, I would gladly die in battle defending my homeland. I love my country more than my own life. But I would also be more than willing to give my last breath in the name of, say, Mexico, Panama, Japan, or the Czech Republic. The most honorable thing a man can do is lay down his life for his country. Or another country. The important thing is that it’s a country.”
The Rime of the Anglyng Touryst—A Summer Poem
[This week we’ll be saying goodbye to summer with three summer-themed poems I wrote during the summer. This first number, based on my fishing trip, is a parody of “The Rime of the Ancient Mariner” by Samuel Taylor Coleridge.]
The Rime of the Anglyng Touryst
by Caleb Coy
It is an angling Tourist,
And he renteth a cheap rod.
“I’ve cut my shrimp in quarters.
Will I catch me a cod?”
Optimistic as the rising sun,
He casts out with a wink
(Because it’s all in the wrist,
Or so he’s been told to think).
He feels a little wiggle
He feels a little pull
“I think I’ve got a live one!
I’ve yanked him from the shoal!”
Alas, on pillars snagged—
It appears that when he cast
A wave brought his line inward
To the pier the hook held fast!
He gives a friendly wave
To a stranger down the pier,
Who knows what he is doing—
(That’s why he fishes here).
Then comes another tug—
“This time it is for real!”
A big knot he untangles,
But soon he’ll have his meal.
Perched above, a pelican—
Patiently it stares,
Chin tucked with the posture
Of a fasting saint in prayer.
[Dedicated to Charley Gwaltney]
A Church Divided—Confessions From a Millenial—Link
A Church Divided—Confessions From a Millenial—Link
An honest millennial shares the struggles of growing up with know-it-all ignorance, swinging into know-nothing ignorance, and striving for the spiritual balance of theological confidence and humility.
Why We Like Duck Dynasty, and Why We Need More TV Like It
It’s a family reality show that should not have happened, according to probability. It would be hard sell, you see: A show about a duck call warehouse—no. A show about a family that wears camo and beards all the time—no. A show about a family that celebrates their faith and eats good food—no. Producers might give such a family a 20-minute spot on some show about America’s unique families. They look like Tolkien characters given rifles and Southern accents. And yet someone saw the potential in giving the Robertson clan their own show.
CALEB COY 