Blacksburgia webisode 12:
Farmer’s Market Fiasco
A war breaks out between retail outlets and a Farmer’s Market that tries to open up in the parking lot. The retail outlet fights with zoning ordinances to shut down the market, while Freddie and Bridgette scramble to evade a lawsuit and keep the Farmer’s Market running.
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Blacksburgia webisode 11:
Sinkholes
In the wake of the high school sinkhole disaster, numerous citizens are worried that their property, or that one of the various establishments they frequent, is sitting on a sink hole. In order to quell recent fears of property values and the population declining, Frankie and Bridgette must hire a geologist to alleviate any suspicions and reassure the populace. He checks the town out, and addresses the town in a press conference.
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Blacksburgia webisode 10:
Ladies and Gentlemen…Nikki Giovanni and Bill Cosy!
Billy Cosby is invited to do his final stand up act at Virginia Tech. Unaware of Nikki Giovanni’s attitude towards Cosby’s attitude towards the “young thugs with their pants hangin’ down” across America, the university asks Nikki Giovanni to write a poem dedicated to his life and work for African Americans, and urges her to include a line about “jello pudding pops” (because it alliterates after all). She throws up a big stir about the absurdity of it, and huge protests gather around the English department demanding that Cosby not do his final show at Tech. Nikki begins to receive hate mail for causing Cosby’s show to cancel, mail mostly from old white people.
Sustainable Meth Lab
This webisode is a PR/instructional video for a sustainable meth-amphetamine production laboratory that seeks ecologically sustainable ways to cook meth while using as little energy as possible, using more natural, biodegradable resources, producing fewer greenhouse gases, and relying on solar energy. The video is meant to be distributed secretly, but accidentally leaks to the mayor, who receives the video from an anonymous tip.
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The Perpetual Rotating Cadet
Frankie and Bridget are working in the VT library when they spot some ROTC cadets walking on the sidewalk outside their window. They observe that while walking to class in their uniforms the cadets have to walk in stiff, straight lines parallel to the sidewalks and turn at right angles on the corners, and are only allowed to turn to the right. One of the cadets gets “stuck” somehow at an odd spot on the walkway and is locked into a perpetual loop of taking two steps and turning right. Frankie and Bridgette stare out the window at the poor cadet.
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Blacksburgia webisode 7:
Cloth Carpet
A young married couple with a child recounts their journey from regular diapers, to cloth diapers, to cloth toilet paper, to— finally—their invention and advocacy of cloth carpet. Much like the diapers and toilet paper, the couple discovered that they could save on worrying and constant cleaning if they just allowed their toddlers to urinate, defecate, and vomitate on their cloth carpet made from recycled materials, which they wash once among with a steam vac. The go on and on about the benefits. Very practical.
Blacksburgia webisode 6:
Save the Curb Strip
A group of green activists have blocked the scheduled demolishing of a small curb strip that is soon to transform a 2-lane stretch of road into a 3-lane-stretch of road. Although the curb strip has only 400 sq. ft. of grass and three small bushes, the activist group relentlessly stands in the way of construction plans on every level.
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Blacksburgia webisode 5: Vegetarian with Fish
Vegetarian with Fish
Part I—
Frankie and Bridgette decide to eat consciously and visit Gillie’s restaurant. They spend twenty minutes figuring out exactly what kind of restaurant it is: “Vegetarian with fish. Ok, so there’s no meat, but there is fish. Yes, and there’s also eggs? Ok but that’s vegan, right? I just want to make a conscious decision. Are we doing the right thing here? Who makes your bread? Ok, so not everything’s local but some of it is? Which foods are local? Your potatoes—are they organic? But they are vegan. Your burgers are vegan too, right? What do they use? Where are the beans farmed? This fly in my soup—is it locally harvested? I’m still confused about the whole vegan but also fish thing. Honey, are we making the right decision here? Oh, there’s live music!”
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La Leche League Lactivism Litigation:
A group of women form a breastfeeding support group circle on a park lawn. A complaint is lodged against them because their group is offensive and indecent. When they prepare to argue against the complaint before the city council, we discover that the complaint is not actually about their “expose breasts”, but was a complaint from a radical feminist art shop owner who believes breastfeeding and domestic motherhood to be demeaning to women, and that society should not be exposed to such repressive practices.
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Hooptie Ride Ad
An ad for Hooptie Ride featuring drunken testimonials, including sorority sisters, frat boys, bar hoppers, runaway brides, hookers, two white boys who listen to hardcore rap and drink Fuze to try and sober up, a sassy 10-year-old on having a birthday party, and an old lady who just wanted to get to the airport to see her daughter.
The Hokey Pokey Rickshaw, The Mystery Mobile, The Yellow Submarine, The Purple People Eater and other magical mystery vehicles are shown cruising down the road as a casual rider pukes out the back window. The crew is shown cleaning the smell off the plush upholstery to ensure a pleasant ride for future customers.
“Warning: Good Times Are Closer Than They Appear!” Rides are 8 dollas a pop.
CALEB COY 