Oh, you’re going to win Makin’ Music this year? Condescending Wonka shares his thoughts:
Lighting Chinese Floating Lanterns: The Importance of Following Directions
I feel it is time to bring your attention to the importance of following directions when releasing a Chinese floating lantern. I also want to stress the importance of the directions being properly translated into English in the first place.
My wife and I bought a Chinese floating lantern from an undisclosed website. The English translation for the product is “Light of Wishing”
Jeremy Marshall Articulately responds to “What Would You Do if an Intruder Threatened Your Family?”
Jeremy Marshall Articulately responds to “What Would You Do if an Intruder Threatened Your Family?”
From the post:
“So you pacifist types, what will you do if some armed intruder breaks into your home to murder/rape/rob/cannibalize you and your family?” What this really is, is a leading question. They expect that you will say, “Just let them eat my babies, I guess,” and then they can chide you for being an irresponsible, unloving, yellow-bellied terrible excuse for a spouse/parent/guardian. But if they can get you to say, “I would use violence to defend my family,” then they can back you into the corner of saying, “Well, how is going to war any different when you go to war to defend others?” Of course there are two obvious counters: a) no recent wars have actually been premised upon such lofty ideals (no matter what the leaders of our Empire tell you) and b) the immediate threat of a specific armed intruder is a much simpler moral dilemma to parse out than the often dubious claims upon which actual wars are based.
“Let me Axe You About Using ‘Axe'”
“I’m sorry. Did you mean to say you ‘asked‘ me a question? Because ‘axe‘ is something you chop wood with.”
Ever hear that one? There is a reason I ‘axe‘ this question of you.
We commonly hear that saying “axe” when you mean “ask” is bad grammar, is a sign of ignorance. Is this true? And what does the use of “axe” say about a person?
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Did Jesus Really Raise from the Dead?
N.T. Wright no the ancient historicity of the resurrection.
Is peace utopianism? War certainly is
Alexander Campbell, Tolbert Fanning, David Lipscomb: A Nineteenth-Century Anti-War Triumvirate
Alexander Campbell, Tolbert Fanning, David Lipscomb: A Nineteenth-Century Anti-War Triumvirate
Three early Church of Christ restoration leaders on war, peace, and the body of Christ.
Why It Ain’t a Crime to Say “Ain’t”
” ‘Ain’t’ ain’t in the dictionary.”
Ever hear that one? The colloquial phrase “ain’t” is typically a contracted variation of “am/is/are/was/were not”.
We commonly hear that “ain’t” is improper, is bad grammar, is a sign of ignorance. Is this true? And what does the use of “ain’t” say about us?
Conventionally, many people suppose that it is. After all, in none of the preceding forms of “to be” that ends in the word combination “ain”. Yet somehow we have ain’t. This leaves us with the question, “how did this develop?”
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The Conclusion to “My Week at the Full Armor Lectures” by Jeremy Marshall
“My Week at the Full Armor Lectures”
by Jeremy Marshal
the Shocking Truth:
From the Conclusion:
“When I wrote these, I wrote them
for children who were told that dancing is tantamount to sex.
For girls who were taught that their bodies were shameful by preachers who blamed Bathsheba for David’s sin.
For families where brothers and sisters were not even allowed to swim in the same pool for fear of arousing unnatural passions.
For those who have lived in constant fear of hell because of a soteriology that can only be described as, “Once saved, always in jeopardy.”
For those who have been deprived the comfort of the Holy Spirit’s presence in their life by preachers who told them that the Spirit dwells only in the Bible.
For entire families of preachers who have literally been kicked to the curb without notice because of a homiletical misstep or a personality conflict with a power-hungry eldership.
For those who have been told, “We will not even baptize you until you divorce your wife, because your marriage is unscriptural. It is better to break up your family than to burn in hell.”
For the women who have been “put in their place.”
For the LGBTQ family members who have spent hellish years trembling in the closet.
For the young alcoholic booted out of the Christian college without so much as an offer of help or treatment.
For the young man with a porn addiction who confided this to an elder and was threatened, “I’ll bet your momma would be real ashamed if she knew what you were doing.”
For the men with porn addictions who were told in the Open Forum of a Christian college lectureship: “I don’t see how it’s a problem. I love to go fishing, but if Jesus told me not to do it, I’d get rid of my rod and reel. It’s that simple, boys.”
I wrote these for everyone who has ever felt the need to pray, “Lord, protect me from my brethren.”
My Week at the Full Armor Lectures: Wednesday, part 2 by Jeremy Marshall
My Week at the Full Armor Lectures
by Jeremy Marshal
Wednesday, part 2
From the harrowing climax that is called Wednesday part 2:
I remembered that Sharp and MacDoogan had called the Bacon Lane elders the night before and sowed seeds of doubt about my mental stability. I could tell that my assertion that they were attempting to extort me, combined with the tape of my meltdown at the breakfast table, wasn’t helping my case. On the other hand, Brother Dean is one of those tin-foil-hat conspiracy theorist guys. He believes the world is ran by the Club of Rome, that the government is trying to poison us with fluoride in our drinking water, that the Holocaust and themoon landing never happened, and that the real culprit behind 9/11 was the Jews. How could a fellow who believed all that stuff not believe that I was being railroaded? Seems like it’d be right up his alley, really. “Were they also trying to blackmail you when you cussed out Mack Snipes?” he asked.
CALEB COY 