10 Reasons I am not a Hipster:
1. My bike has gears, and the maintenance I do on it consists solely of pumping the tires.
2. I did like the Avett Brothers before they were cool, but I also still like them, and do not believe they have sold out.
3. I have never voted Democrat, and just because I’ve been fair to Obama doesn’t mean I like him.
4. When I go to a coffee shop, I keep my shoes on, and my laptop off. On most days.
6. These glasses are prescription, and I got them because they were cheap and durable.
7. I have never gone more than a week on a diet consisting solely of either vegan food or junk food (you know, to be ironic).
8. I have some vinyl, but I do not have my own record player. Yet.
9. I own a Coldplay CD. Ok, more than one. Ok, like three. But I seldom listen to them anymore. Wait, what am I defending again? Oh, right. So I own some Coldplay.
10. I have too many pairs of baggy jeans, and often require a belt. I think this last one settles the matter for good.