Readers,

This past six months some writing has come out.

I just had an essay just come out in Plough, “Eating Anything”
Read it here!

In April there was a short story in Pensive magazine, “A Forthright Account of a Brown Dog’s Repercussions On the Heart.”

We’ve had a string of poems:

“Blind Woman” in Broad River Review

“Pancake” in Berkeley Poetry Review

“The Only Signal of Trouble” in Slant

“It Is Me Or The Smart Watch” in Chiron Review

“Sound” in Connecticut River Review

And here are the satires:

“After Watching Several Films, I Know Why The Civil War Happened”

—Doctor Funny

“What Will Happen After A Public Figure Says Something Politically Incorrect”

—MuddyUm

“This Is Our Reese’s Peanut Butter Pink Heart, Which In No Way Resembles A Baby Scrotum”

—The Haven

“Happy Artificial Sweetener Day To Our Corporate Valentines!”

—MuddyUm

“My Inner Monologue When I Eat Alone At Panda Express”

—Slackjaw

“Though I Be Banished From The Kingdom, I Can Still Sell You These Golden Boots
—Muddyum

“Children’s Programming For Drugged Out Parents”

—Weekly Humorist

“Prepare To Suffer In Easter Hell Because You Did Not Celebrate Enough by Our Impossible Standards”

—Jane Austen’s Wastebasket

“I’ll Waste Millions On Anti-Homeless Architecture, But I Cannot Spend A Penny On Free Housing”

—Jane Austen’s Wastebasket

“Christopher Nolan’s Dark Knight, Revised For Theatrical Release in China”

—Slackjaw

“If You Want More Real, Honest, And Politically INcorrect Stories That’ll Have The Media Gasping, I Can Keep Tweeting Them”

—The Haven

“Everyone In My Child’s Graduating Class is Cordially Invited To My Child’s Graduation Party”

—MuddyUm

“The Trolley Has An Existential Right To Protect Itself”

—MuddyUm

“Things King Charles Probably Told His Portrait Artist”

—The Haven, May 2024

“The Entire Prosecutorial Team of the Nuremberg Trials Is Anti-Nazi, Which Makes It A Witch-Hunt”

—The Haven, May 2024

“A Day In The Life of “Mister” Anthony Fauci, As Imagined By Marjorie Taylor Greene”

—McSweeney’s, June 2024

“The Invisible Hand of the Market Will Lower Those Gas Prices Any Minute Now”

—MuddyUm, June 2024

“How To Level Your Off-Balance Maytag Washer In 45 Simple Steps”

—Jane Austen’s Wastebasket, June 2024

“Unwelcomee ‘I Hardly Know Her’ Punchlines From Your Obnoxious Coworker”

–Weekly Humorist, June 2024

“You Want A Car That Honks Three Times When You Lock It”

—MuddyUm, July 2025

“A Blurb On The Back Of My Fourth Best-Seller About How I’m Being Cancelled”

—Doctor Funny, July 2024

“Benito Mussolini Is the Strong Man America Needs Right Now”

—MuddyUm, July 2024

“Here At VeriMark, Our Home Page Tells You Nothing About Who We Are”

—McSweeney’s, July 2024